Why Are Some People Unable to Love Again?

Trying to re-think the vicious attack on your soul—one which almost ended your life with it, and there is nothing in the world to make sense or comfort when the winds start rebelling and the winter of life starts playing with each step that you take. And still to the dismay, there are people out there, melted and destroyed, unaware that they have been struck by the cruelest gift of all.

Why is it that some people are unable to love again after being left heartbroken? The answer, always about the answer when there are so few. The spark of your soul when you first fell in love, that autumn under the glowing tree, whose branches swirled with love songs as you swiftly held her naked hands, the currents of life and the promises forged on this land—they stared and could never let go, love love love—all but lost.

But, it had to be, now that the same tree longs for you and her to lie under it, knowing that it will never happen again. Love was gone when the seasons over-turned but your heart, how could it ever come into terms. So you sit and think, and think till you shrink—there is no life but open tragedy. It would take you a while to finally get over it and when you do, it is a good feeling.

Now that life wants to dance again, you want to but you just cannot. It’s as if there is a hammer placed at the back of your head and any attempts you make to open your heart to someone, it shall strike you at the epicenter of your brain, constantly reminding you of what you have now become.

So, what is this chaos of unending perplexity and fragility that so convincingly defines you now. The psychology of life and love, the distorted mind that can no longer love now. It’s as if you are too afraid to fall in love again, the neuro-chemistry that has been re-configured as you are consciously aware of all the damages that it could do to you, or it once did.

It’s a strange world, as we continually desire acceptance, emotional support and order. But why is it, that a sudden shift in the rules carve us into the persons we did not want to become. Emotional deprivation, times when you wanted nothing but acceptance and you got rejected—well it’s a factor now affecting you the most. So much pain that love unfolds, all you could do is avoid being a part of it now.

But above all, the recurring thought dwelling inside your mind—purest pain, the residuals of love and affection. You cannot just open-up to anyone now, the vulnerable mind that has to be extra cautious. You somehow get plastered to the idea that everyone would leave and in the genuineness of that sole thought, you lie in your room, acting like you are alright when you are not.

The desires to be loved, but the overwhelming thought of being hurt—a paradox of life that one has to live with. There is no escaping the voracious tragedy that love presents us with, or the crowded room, which was supposed to be yours only—but reality that does not present as planned.

So hold your heart, the beats in blaze—ones which nobody understands. It’s a glaringly difficult life, and with it, emotional torments that make it much complicated. All the foxes dance now, and you do not need to lose yourself in this process but find meaning in what each day presents you with.

-Yogesh Chandra